Friday, May 21, 2021


stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, nuclear stress test, treadmill, heart, atomic

Not so coincidentally, I'm actually having a nuclear stress test this morning as part of an overall healthy checkup on my heart and other increasingly out-of-warranty organs. I'd never heard of the procedure before, but when my doctor ordered it up I thought "that is the coolest sounding test ever!

What can I say, I'm a "duck & cover" child of the 50's.


Sergio said...

Johnny's not likely to be one of the Grateful Dead. Don't stress about nuke-you-lar energy as Dubya might say.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Being a member of the Cardiac Club for nearly 15 years, I prefer not using the treadmill, myself. :)

Jim Lane said...

Had one of those about 2 years ago. Piece of cake! Kinda boring, actually. No explosions or runaway Geiger counters---

Kent Whitehead said...

I hear the test isn't so bad, it's The Day After that sucks.

John in Philly said...

The test and the treadmill were OK.
It was a lot of years ago and during the time I worked at the airport for INS.
A couple of days later I was still emitting enough radiation to set off our radiation detectors.

I remember that the person who administered the equivalent of the radioactive spider bite wore an exposure ring, and she said that the half life is so short that the dose had to be given on the day it was ordered.

I'm still waiting for my superpowers to surface.

Snark said...

There are two versions, I've had both. They inject a radioactive tracer dye in both versions, for one you walk on a treadmill until your heart rate reaches their required level. For the other they also inject a chemical to simulate (and stimulate) a heart attack. When you fall off the table they give you the antidote. Yeah.....nope.

DougM said...

Dammit, Stilton!
I banged my knee getting under my desk.
Looks like all my elementary school training back in the '50s still has an effect

Drew458 said...

Similar to DougM's response ... Johnny's little friend with the murderous pull toy could put a handkerchief over him for stealth attacks, inventing her own version of duck and cover.

Ok, that was a stretch. Sorry.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Drew: I refuse to be earwormed alone.


Rod said...

I hope your nuke-stress test (no big deal; just takes a while) showed your heart lit up like those big new LED stoplights.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Sergio- The test was no big deal. I haven't heard results yet, but expect everything to be in good shape!

@M. Mitchell Marmel- I went for the injection route rather than the treadmill. I just didn't want to run myself breathless while wearing a mask.

@Jim Lane- Someone had described the test to me in colorful and some inaccurate terms, giving me just a little apprehension. You're right - it was mostly boring.

@Kent Whitehead- I see what you did there.

@John in Philly- Now I feel foolish for not having any radioactivity detectors in my home. I'll note, however, that my pee didn't seem to glow or anything.

@Snark- Yes, I was worried about the "simulated heart attack" thing, but it was explained to me (accurately) that the injection wouldn't make my heart race, but I might feel some pressure on my chest and shortness of breath. I felt both, but they weren't distressing. And the antidote was simply coffee, which I'd been denied until after the test. The injection apparently dilates your veins, and caffeine constricts them again. So maybe they've improved the injection since you had it?

@DougM- I wonder how today's snowflakes would feel about spending their childhoods regularly hiding from potential nuclear blasts? Or being told that the "safe space" was under their school desk?

@Drew458- "Mr Duck and Cover" could make a good, and terrifying, children's story.

@Rod- I haven't heard the results yet, but the techs didn't burst into tears or anything. Then again, I don't think they were very attached to me.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Stilton: If they don't call within a couple of hours telling you "Get to the damned hospital NOW!!!", you're probably okeh. Don't ask me how I know. ;^.^

Pete (Detroit) said...

3M - I remember that movie.... also thinking that if you see the flash, it's too late.
When The Day After came out (in college) some guys knew I'd grown up in Detroit. Dd you ever worry about a Nuke attack? Nope - you can see the Rouge Complex from my house (slight exaggeration, but not much) Always figured I was within the Crater Radius, "Turn me to ash, in the first big flash"
Then later, I find out there was not one, but *16* Nike ABM facilities here...